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495 pages, Kindle Edition
Published May 4, 2017
Was there a handbook that could tell me what to do next? There were thousands of books that taught parenting; I was pretty sure there wasn't a self-help book about alien roommates. If there was, it was probably about abductees, not subletters.
Look, you can't take people off their planet willy-nilly. It's called alien abduction, and is frowned upon in the most respectable circles.